I’m half asleep writing this but I’ll try and get across what I need to say. I’m going. I’m going to go in August. I need this. While sitting on the train the other day I realised that if I don’t go now, I might regret it for the rest of my life. If I don’t like it, I can come back.

Went on a date the other day. It went really well. Only thing is, I want to go. She knows this, I’ve made it all clear what I want. She said she didn’t mind and that she wanted to spend as much time with me before I leave. It’s people like this that you should hold onto. They’re the people that are going to be there when you hit the lows and help you pick yourself up.

Another point, somebody said I was grumpy for the first time in a long time the other day. I didn’t think I was but they said that it’s obvious when I am because I always have a smile on my face. On this day though, I didn’t. I just hugged the person. I realised a couple of days later why I was grumpy that day. I’m not going to put it on here or tell anyone why. It’s just so obvious to me why.

A last point, I thought I wouldn’t think about a friend as much as I have done. A lot has been said but this person still drifts into my thoughts from time to time. The normal things, are they okay, are people looking after them and are they happy. I like to think I know this person quite well and I know the sort of things that they will be thinking. I just want them to know that I’m here for them. I do miss them but I don’t think they miss me. I read somewhere the other day that you shouldn’t give up on anybody that comes into your thoughts once a day.